I keep seeing people say things like “If you aren’t nice then you are going to alienate your allies.” Well, if that’s all it takes, they aren’t actually allies and it’s okay to alienate them because they aren’t really interested in moving the group forward in the first place. Because of this ongoing line of complete illogical bullshishery, I have comprised a list. Now, this isn’t complete and will likely, with your help, be updated from time to time.
- Is your want for helping a certain community contingent on..? Well, anything? If you have any moment where you would say “I am not going to be an ally for your community anymore if you don’t…” then you are not an ally. Please stop calling yourself and ally.
- Does your belief get time off? If you are only “Supportive” when you are around certain people, namely those within the community you are claiming to be an ally for but nowhere else, you are not an ally. Please stop calling yourself an ally.
- Do you find that you are more interested in being an ally when you are interested or dating someone within said community? Wanting to fuck someone that belongs to a community other than your own does not make you an ally. Please stop calling yourself an ally.
- Are you a celebratory ally? Are you suddenly calling yourself an ally for the LGBTQ community when you know the Pride Parade is coming? Seriously, they know people show up that couldn’t care less about their community. We all know. Please stop calling yourself an ally.
- Do you announce your ally status during arguments or accusation? If you are called out on something you’ve done or if you are in an argument with someone from a specific community, do you use your ally status to try to “Prove” that you haven’t or wouldn’t do whatever it is you’ve been accused of? Example- Me: You just said blah blah and that was racist. You: I am not a racist, I am an ally for racial equality and if I was so racist, I wouldn’t be going to help underprivileged kids all the time. (This is an actual quote)
If you answered yes to any of the above questions, you are not an ally. Please do not refer to yourself as such.